I am a 31-year-old new dad in Minneapoli

Answer

I'll pull the relevant cards before answering — this is a new-parent fragmented-sleep question, not classic insomnia, so I'll read the life-stages and child-sleep references plus hygiene for the nap/environment specifics.

This is a life-stage fork — a new parent with a 6-week-old infant. The "fork" is fragmented schedule driven by infant night waking, not classic insomnia and not a delayed clock. Below is the fork, tonight's moves, the weekly anchor, and the safe-sleep framing for the baby.

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## Fork

This is **life-stage fragmented sleep**, not insomnia and not a delayed clock.

- **Insomnia (onset / middle / early):** the night is intact and the adult's habits or clock are the problem.
- **Delayed sleep phase:** you fall asleep late and wake fine when nothing forces you up.
- **New-parent fragmenter (you):** the adult's sleep is being **chopped** by the baby's feeds and wakings every 2 hours, plus the 3 PM crash is cumulative sleep debt, not a clock problem. Treating it as "I need better sleep hygiene" misses it. The real lever is **splitting the night with your partner** so one adult gets an unbroken block, plus a daytime power nap before the crash, not a clock change.

Source: `references/life-stages.md` (life-stage framing) · `references/child-sleep.md` (infant night waking is normal through the first year) · accessed 2026-09-02.

## Tonight (the 2–3 moves)

1. **Split the night into two blocks.** Decide with your partner who is "on" from, say, 22:00–02:00 and who is "on" from 02:00–06:00. The off-block adult is **asleep, phone away, in a dark cool room** — not dozing on the sofa. The on-block adult does every wake, feed, and resettling in those hours. Even a 4-hour unbroken block is enough to drop the worst of the 3 PM crash.
2. **One 20-min power nap, before 15:00, not after.** Set an alarm, sit or lie somewhere safe (not the sofa with the baby), close your eyes. 20 minutes only — past ~25 min you go deep and wake worse. Earlier in the day is fine; after 15:00 it eats into tonight's sleep.
3. **Protect the sleep environment.** Blackout curtains or an eye mask, white noise or fan, room at roughly 65–68°F / 18–20°C. Phone out of reach when you're the off-block adult. The on-block adult does feeds in low warm light only — bright light at 02:00 resets everyone's clock.

Source: `references/hygiene.md` (stable wake, dark/cool/quiet, nap timing) · `references/child-sleep.md` (the off-block adult should be properly asleep, not on the sofa — sofa + baby + exhaustion is the unsafe combination) · accessed 2026-09-02.

## The weekly anchor

**One parent is properly asleep during their block. Never both of you on the sofa with the baby, never one adult dozing through a feed.**

This is the line you hold when you're tired and tempted to "just power through" or both crash together. The split can rotate night-to-night if it feels fairer — what can't bend is that one adult is asleep in a real bed while the other is on.

## Safe sleep for the baby (do not skip)

While you redesign your night:

- Baby on their **back**, every sleep, naps and nights.
- **Firm, flat, empty** sleep surface — own bassinet or cot, no pillows, loose blankets, bumpers, or soft toys.
- **oom-share, not bed-share**, for at least the first 6 months.
- **No sofa or armchair with the baby.** If you think you might drift off, put the baby down in their own safe space first, before the feed or cuddle.
- **No bed-sharing** if anyone has had alcohol, smokes, is on sedating meds, or the baby is preterm or under 2.5 kg.

Source: AAP / HealthyChildren.org · NHS · Lullaby Trust · WHO — accessed 2026-09-02.

## Hand off

See a clinician if any of these show up: you have **breathing pauses** observed by your partner, you cannot stay awake while **driving** (sleepy driving is a stop — arrange the ride, clinician or licensing authority decides fitness to drive), or mood is sliding into something heavier than exhaustion. Caffeine timing and any sleep aid are a conversation for your doctor or pharmacist — I'll stay out of milligrams and combinations.

Want me to set a fixed wake-time reminder or a "block is up, switch" reminder once you've decided the split? Tell me the two switch times (e.g. 02:00 and 06:00) and I'll wire it up.