My in-laws just texted that they booked
Ask
My in-laws just texted that they booked flights to visit us for 3 full weeks next month and plan to stay in our 2-bedroom apartment where we have a 1-year-old and both work from home full-time. They didn't ask about dates or duration beforehand.
My husband agrees that having them in our small apartment for 3 weeks while working will overwhelm everyone, but he freezes when communicating with his parents because he doesn't want to hurt their feelings. We can comfortably host them in our guest room for 5 days, and for the rest of their trip we'd love to help them book a nearby hotel or Airbnb with a kitchen.
Can you give my husband a warm, firm, speakable script to text his parents tonight that welcomes them but sets the 5-day apartment stay limit clearly, plus what he can say if they push back or act hurt?
Answer
Him → his parents (text tonight):
> Mom, Dad — really glad you booked to come next month. One quick thing on the stay: [wife] and I both work from home full-time, and with the baby the apartment's tight past a few days. Here's what works: we'd love to host you in the guest room for the first 5 days ([arrival]–[date 5]). For the rest of the trip we'll help you find a nearby Airbnb with a kitchen, so you have your own space and we still get plenty of time together. Want me to send a few options this week?
**If they push back or act hurt**
- "We haven't seen the baby in so long — we want as much time as possible":
"We want that too. Five days with us is the long mornings and bedtime — that's the family time. The Airbnb is so the work day keeps working, and we can still do dinners most nights."
- "Why can't we stay longer? He's our only grandchild":
"I know. Five days is what fits our setup right now — apartment, work, the baby's naps. The Airbnb keeps you close, not far."
- Hurt, silence, or guilt ("after all we did to get here"):
"I hear you. I'm not changing the plan. I do want the visit to work — let me send a few Airbnb options tonight so we can move forward."
**Hold the line (if they keep pressing — same sentence, no debate):**
"Five days in the apartment, Airbnb with a kitchen for the rest. That's the plan."
**One thing on the channel:** if they call upset, he can say "I'd rather keep this in text so we're on the same page" and end the call. The 5-day cap is the ask; he doesn't have to defend it on the phone.
Limits: I'm working from what you told me — actual dates, his parents' tone, and the work schedule are his to fill in. If the in-laws have a hard "we can't afford an Airbnb" reaction, that's a separate money conversation I'd handle with them directly, not on this thread.