Our 6th-grade son has an ADHD diagnosis

Answer

I'll read the relevant references and check official 504 guidance so the meeting prep is grounded.

Here's what to bring to Tuesday's meeting. Three pieces: three questions no teacher can answer with "try harder," a 60-second factual read of what's happening at home, and a short pre-meeting note you can send to the 504 coordinator.

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## What kind of meeting this is, and what to ask

This is your son's **annual Section 504 plan review** under 34 C.F.. Part 104 — an individual team meeting (you, the 504 coordinator, the relevant general-ed teachers, usually an admin or school psychologist), not a regular parent-teacher conference. It usually runs 30–45 minutes and the team's job is to look at what's working in the current accommodations, what isn't, and what to adjust **in writing** ([U.S. Department of Education — Section 504 FAPE FAQ](https://www.ed.gov/laws-and-policy/civil-rights-laws/disability-discrimination/frequently-asked-questions-section-504-free-appropriate-public-education-fape), accessed 2026-09-16).

The progress report language — *"He is capable and bright, but chooses not to apply himself and turns in blank worksheets"* — is a **characterization** about motivation, not an observation. The meeting is the right place to redirect: from *"why isn't he trying"* to *"what does he actually do in the moment, and which accommodations are active then."* Don't relitigate the label; just don't accept it as the answer. Federal regulations require the team to draw on information "from a variety of sources" (34 C.F.. § 104.35), so what you bring from home is part of the record by right, not by request.

**One thing to know before you walk in**: federal law sets the floor (504 exists, OC enforces, FAPE is required, team must use multiple sources). District-level specifics — exact team composition, written plan format, reconvene timeline, what happens if you and the team disagree — are set by **your district's 504 procedures**. If anyone in the meeting says something is or isn't allowed, ask for the district's written 504 procedure on that point before you agree.

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## The three questions

(Phrase them as written. The team is required to consider observable behavior, current accommodation delivery, and a written next step.)

1. **On [date]'s progress report, [teacher name] wrote:** *"He is capable and bright, but chooses not to apply himself and turns in blank worksheets."* Pick one specific worksheet that came home blank in the past two weeks — history or math. **Walk us through the moment it was handed out in class. At that moment, what did he do — start, freeze, ask, skip?** In the past four school weeks, how many worksheets in each subject have come home blank or near-blank? *(Observable behavior, not motivation. If the answer is "I don't know," that itself is the answer — accommodations are not being tracked at the level they need to be.)*

2. **Our current 504 plan lists [accommodations].** Which of those were active for [son] in history and math during the same period? Specifically: who on staff is the named owner for each accommodation, how is delivery tracked (a log, a check-in, a system), and were there weeks where any of them were not delivered? *(Asks the team to point to delivery, not just existence on paper.)*

3. **By the end of today's meeting, what specific changes will be written into the amended 504 plan, who drafts the amended document, by what date will we receive the written amended plan, and on what date does the team reconvene to confirm whether the changes are actually working in class?** *(This locks in the written next step and a follow-up date before anyone leaves the room.)*

If at any point the team gives you a generalized "he just needs to try harder" answer, the polite reframe is: *"I'm asking for the observable — what he did at the moment, and which accommodation was active then. If we don't have that information, I'd like today's plan to include a way to capture it going forward."* That moves the conversation from judgment to data.

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## 60-second home brief (read this to the team)

| Field | What to fill in |
|---|---|
| Day / subject / minutes | The single worst recent incident — e.g., *Tuesday, history worksheet, 45 minutes* |
| Frequency this past2 weeks | How many worksheets per subject came back blank or near-blank |
| Start–end time | e.g., *4:15 pm – 5:00 pm, kitchen table* |
| Body reaction | Crying, stomach ache, refusing to sit, leaving the table |
| His exact words | One quoted sentence — *"I don't know where to start."* |
| Independent completion | What % he did alone vs. needed someone sitting next to him |
| ecent changes | New teacher, new class, new med dose, sleep change — or *none* |
| What we've tried at home | Break into chunks, sit beside him, reduce distractions, timer — and what happened |

Verbal opener, ~60 seconds:

> *"At home this past [week], on his history worksheet on [day], [son] sat for 45 minutes without writing his name. He started crying and said, quote, 'I don't know where to start.' This pattern happened [N] times across [history/math] in the past two weeks. He does about [X]% on his own; the rest needs one of us sitting beside him. Nothing changed at home, at school, or with his medication recently. We've tried [action 1] and [action 2]; [result]. We're seeing freeze-then-tears, not avoidance — does the same pattern show up in class, or does it look different there?"*

(Per the federal "multiple sources" rule, this is your side of the data. They're required to consider it.)

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## Pre-meeting note (send1–2 business days before Tuesday)

```
Subject: Section 504 Annual eview — [Son's Name] — [Meeting Date]

Dear [504 Coordinator Name],

Ahead of our annual504 review on [date] at [time], I'd like to
confirm a few details and add one item to the agenda.

Please confirm by reply:
• Who will attend from the school side (504 coordinator,
general-ed history, general-ed math, school psychologist,
admin).
• Whether [son]'s current 504 plan and accommodation list can
be sent to me in advance so I can review before we sit down.

I'd like the agenda to include:
1. The worksheets coming home blank — what specifically is observed in class at the moment a worksheet is handed out,
and which current accommodations are active at that moment.
2. The current delivery and tracking of each accommodation —
named owner, how it's tracked, any weeks it was not
delivered.
3. A written amended504 plan with named owner, draft date,
delivery date, and the date the team reconvenes to confirm
the changes are working in class.

One observation from home, for the team record: on [day] he sat
on his history worksheet for 45 minutes without writing his name,
then cried and said "I don't know where to start." This has
happened [N] times in the past two weeks. No recent change at
home, school, or medication.

Thank you,
[Your Name]
[Phone] · [Email]
```

That note does three things in turn: it puts the agenda in writing, it puts a date on the home observation, and it forces the district's own procedure to surface if anyone pushes back.

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## Who does what, and when to look back

- **The 504 team at the meeting**: walks through each current accommodation, identifies which were delivered, drafts amendments in the plan document, sets a reconvene date.
- **You**: send the pre-meeting note by [date — you pick, ideally two business days before Tuesday]. Bring the home observation in the 8-field form. Ask the three questions in order. Before leaving, ask for the amended plan in writing by a specific calendar date and the reconvene date in writing.
- **Follow-up**: the reconvene date the team sets. If they don't set one, propose a date 4–6 weeks out — long enough for changes to show, short enough that you can tell. Once you have the date, tell me and I'll set a reminder.

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One gap that will sharpen all of this: the **date on the progress report** (so the quote can be pinned to a specific reporting period), and the **current accommodations written into your son's 504 plan** (so question 2 is precise, not generic). If you can paste those in, I'll tighten the questions to match exactly what's already on paper.